Spooky October - Gay Matchmaking Agency - London New York Berlin Toronto - The Echelon Scene

As Halloween is soon upon us- we thought that we would prepare a fun little game of ‘spooky scaries’ and ‘don’t ghost.’ 'Dont ghost' showing examples of where our members are too quick to judge, run too fast and don’t give things a chance- and 'Spooky scary' where our members need to run.

‘Spooky scary’

An inbalance of energy put into one another. Don’t give him the world, listen, be there when he needs, support him emotionally/financially, if it is not reciprocated. Later down the line, when you have been in a relationship for a while- there will be times when you need to give 75% and there is an imbalance. But at the beginning it should be an easy 50/50.

‘Don’t ghost’

Online dating doesn’t work for a reason, so making too many snap judgements on pics is never advised. An expression in a photo, is just an expression in a photo. You cannot tell someone’s energy, vibe and character through photos.

‘Spooky scary’

Actions not following words. It is very easy for your date to say how they want to see you again, but are they actually seeing you again. Or for them to say they want a long-term relationship, but are they taking steps towards that? The best way often with men is to watch, with your ears covered. And just because he isn’t taking action, do not internalise that- there are a lot of avoidant's out there. Don’t take it personal.

‘Don’t ghost’

A date not having the same hobbies as you. Who cares? This is not relevant to long-term compatibility. You can have separate hobbies and have shared values. So no, your boyfriend doesn’t like running- but does he value health and have a similar energy? Then that's fine! No your boyfriend doesn’t like motorcycles, but he likes you.. he supports your interests and time to pursue your passions. That's what the focus should be on when searching for a partner and what should happen when you love someone, in a healthy partnership.

‘Spooky scary’

He’s not asking you enough about yourself. You are a prize. When you are asked about yourself – do they remember what you said? Are they even asking any questions at all? Be warned though, don’t mistake nerves (which can show up as over talking about oneself) as lack of interest. It can often mean the opposite. And be sure to pipe in, those are the best conversations. But if over time if they still don’t know anything about you and you do them..or they are proclaiming to really like you, without truly even knowing you, watch out.

‘Don’t ghost’

You’ve met, you get on like a house on fire and you find him attractive, but fireworks aren’t going off. Don’t throw in the towel! If in the first thirty seconds you don’t want to rip his clothes off, that is OK. Don't panic. Yes, physical attraction is key. But first judgements are often incorrect. Time can really change people, so give great first dates that might not have flaming chemistry- a try.

Reach out directly to The Echelon Scene's Founder- Jacqueline Burns, for more questions.